CHOOSE FRIENDS SLOWLY AND WISELY -- Devotional for July 1, from "Good Seeds"

He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Leave the presence of a fool or you will not discern words of knowledge. (Proverbs 13:20; 14:7)

The family we are born into is not of our own choosing. Our parents, siblings, cousins, etc., well, we’re stuck with them, aren’t we, for good or for ill! Think of it like the cultures in which marriages are arranged by the parents. What use would there be for dating if mating were pre-ordained by the family elders? The right attitude to take in either of these scenarios is to make the best of it by being the best brother, sister, son, daughter, husband, or wife that you possibly can be. In Acts 17:25 Paul spoke of the “appointed times and boundaries of habitation” that every human being is subject to. It is by the sovereign plan of God that we live in the country and family and era of history that we do. We can complain about it if we want to, but beyond there's not much else we can do about it. This, however, is not the case when it comes to friendships. We can choose whom we will be close to, and whom we will avoid like the plague! And in the cultures that allow young people to choose their own mates, this is the most important friendship choice of all. There is no more beautiful wedding invitation card than the one inscribed: “Today I marry my best friend!” But the wisdom you use in choosing your mate should also go into choosing your friends. It takes some people far too long to realize that the companions they run with are not turning out to be terribly good for them (and when they finally do, they don’t know what to do about it). Divorce in marriage is a terrible thing (even if sometimes it is the couple’s only recourse in order to keep from killing each other!) Just so, sometimes it becomes evident that your so-called friend is poisoning you and you’ve got to break away. Solomon warns against choosing a fool for a friend. A fool – that’s anyone who thinks first of himself, who indulges the flesh, who disregards his Creator, who disrespects his neighbor, and who cares little for learning. Who, indeed, would choose such a one for a friend? And yet, a fool can fool you! He has many qualities that attract others to him, just as a spider attracts a victim to its web. How can we discern whether or not our friend is really a friend? The best test is simply this: after spending time with him, are you better, or worse, as a person, and as a child of God? A fool will lead you into harmful paths (Psalm 1:1), entice you to do evil (Proverbs 1:10), and draw you away from knowledge. Jeremiah said, “Better to be alone than in the wrong company” (15:17). True, but how much better to be in the company of a good friend! You don’t need many. One or two will do. But take your time. Choose wisely.